This is the story of Chris and Vicky. Chris was married to Vicky, which he remembered in campaign leaflets for the 2010 General Election, when he wrote how important family was to him, but forgot a couple of months later when he set up home with Carina. Chris also forgot he was driving when he was given speeding points, but luckily Vicky remembered she’d forgotten she was driving instead. But then Vicky forgot she’d remembered she was driving after she’d forgotten, and told Vince, Miriam, Lord Matthew, Nick’s closest aides, the lady in the post office and Sooty that she’d remembered she’d forgotten Chris had forced her to take his points, something that Vince, Miriam, Lord Matthew, Nick’s closest aides, the lady in the post office and Sooty deny ever having forgotten they’d remembered.

Confused?  It’s a good job the sentencing judge on Monday won’t be.

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Next Time:  Nick remembers he forgot he used to be a Liberal Democrat, and Lord Rennard forgets he forgot how liberal he’s been with his sexual advances towards every woman on the planet, in a democratic kind of a way.